We arrived just after 9.30pm feeling a bit hungry so went out on to the streets to find a local Thai street 'restaurant'. Here was the first eyebrow raising moment - every street seller and every tuk tuk driver was Muslim! It was like just about everywhere else in the world where Muslims have settled - they have effectively taken over that area - Not that I have anything against Muslim's (only their religion). One further thing became quickly evident - they never smiled! Not to customers, or to each other, just took the money and looked bloody miserable.
This might have been a mistake as it turned out (but we are not certain), within 48 hours, all three of us felt a bit sick, and especially me as I proceeded to throw up for the first time in over 30 years, and once I started I could not stop. This was an event that totally overshadowed the remainder of the planned holiday and perhaps my judgement has been clouded by it, but everything I saw was done stone cold sober and my thoughts were clear, even if my stomach and bowels were not.
Day One
To get to Patong City centre we took a tuk tuk, and cue the next shock - 200 baht minimum (for a 10 minute drive). Twice what you would reasonably expect to pay in Udon Thani. To top this, because it was Friday lunchtime, there were very few tuk tuks available because of Muslim Friday prayers. Yes, Kalim beach comes to a grinding halt for two hours so people can worship and invisible being. (in case you had not guessed, I am not at all religious in any way, shape, form but you don't want to get me started on the subject)
I chose to take root in the Ship Wreck Bar on the Bangla Road to get a feel for the mayhem that is often written about and enjoy several bottles of Tiger Beer. By 4pm I was in the mood to make a night of it but the wife did not share the same viewpoint and I eventually caved in for the sake of a peaceful life and not a disastrous start to the weekend. Shame really as we ended up walking the beach in the dark instead.
Day Two
Due to circumstances beyond my control, this was the last picture I took from our holiday for it was this very spot that I began to feel very ill. That horrible feeling of the stomach trying to force it's way up your throat and beyond. I managed to contain it and began to feel a little better so we boarded the minibus again and headed to the Big Buddha. Sadly just 5 minutes later I was vomiting in to a large plastic bag and felt like shit for the rest of the tour. So bad was it that all I wanted to do was close my eyes and let the world get on with whatever it wanted to get on with. I did not see the Big Buddha or temple, or indeed anything else until we got back to the hotel for more sleep and visits to the bathroom. A little later in the day the wife became ill as well, so all three of us were suffering - it had to be food?
Day Three
I can honestly say that I don't think I have ever been so disappointed - I really do not see what all the fuss is about - unless you have never been to Pattaya or the main nightlife centres in Bangkok. Admittedly this was in the middle of the low season so visitor numbers may have been low but I was expecting to see Thai girls everywhere, gagging to meet single ferang males, but there were hardly any on view. Those that were present were also very subdued and the whole vibe just felt very flat.
The whole of the Bangla Road was little more than an endless stream of couples and families walking up and down and perhaps also wondering what all the fuss was about. The most annoying factor of the Bangla Road though was all the street vendors, mostly trying to sell total junk at greatly inflated prices (cigarettes at 100 Baht, which cost 75 baht in the 7 Evelen just 50 m down the road - for instance). To avoid this constant barrage you need to head up one of the many side streets where there are countless bars. These too were very quiet though and nothing really looked very appealing. Maybe it was because I was still felling a bit ill but I don't think this affected my judgment in any way.
The next day we headed back to Udon Thani, feeling a little better but utterly disappointed with Phuket and all it had to offer.
Back To The Prices
Similar attractions in Udon Thani are 150 baht at most for foreigners, and typically free for Thai's and kids. Restaurant prices ranged from expensive to bloody ridiculous and I nearly fainted when we got back to Phuket Airport to see that Burger King charged 300 baht for a Cheeseburger meal £6.00 - really?). Beer in the bars was more expensive and to be honest I was expecting that, with 80 Baht the cheapest I could find (75 Baht is high for Udon).
Thanks but no thanks. If there was ever an advertisement that highlights the value of a holiday to Udon Thani - this was it! I may go back some day to see if my thoughts on Bangla Road were fully justified or not but the wife never wants to return as she is even tighter with money than me!